I’m taking a page out of Girl On The Contrary’s book and posting a Thought On A Wednesday. My thought today is that it’s not actually today when I’m typing this. It’s currently 6 days before today and I’m in a room with two incessantly flatulent dogs. I wrote about donkey farts today, which is 6 days ago for those of you who have been keeping up. Coincidence? I think not. Psychic prediction? Perhaps.
Time Travel? Definitely.
I’m afraid I’ll go to bed smelling like dog farts. I’m afraid that smell will repel my husband and he’ll be forced to separate himself from me or else wear a hazmat suit to bed. In an effort to prevent this, I’m considering giving my dogs Beano or GasX even though my psychic powers are telling me this is a completely useless and ineffectual idea.
My Thought On A Wednesday is more like a series of thoughts & they are as follows:
• Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure would have been much less exciting if it was titled “Bill & Ted’s Scheduled Report of Wikipedia Regurgita.”
• Dog farts are the number 5, 786th cause of divorce and there is not enough beano in the universe to stop them.
• Only YOU can prevent dog farts…and divorce.
• I had all these thoughts in the past so this whole post is basically a premonition of the future even though I’m writing it in the present. BOOM.