K…an We Talk About Text Etiquette?

Good Morning Friends! Happy Friday! (If you’re reading this from Facebook, for the love of all that is holy, just CLICK THE LINK. Thank you) 🙂

Now that the 30 day 60 day blog challenge is over, it’s time to talk about something else & today I want to talk about the alphabet. There are numerous languages, each having its own unique means of written communication, but for today we are going to focus on the English alphabet; just 26 letters is all it takes to create all the words you see here & many, many more. It’s pretty amazing when you think about it. We can say anything we want to say with the use of just 26 letters, & maybe the occasional emoji (or not so occasional if you’re like me & people don’t know you’re kidding unless you use a smiley at the end of everything). What happens when we have all these magnificent options at our disposal and we choose to use only one of them? You know which one. That’s right…the obnoxious “K.”

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We’re all probably guilty, but let’s examine this for a moment. Why do we do this? Are we just getting so many texts that all we can manage to muster is a single letter before we move on to the next text? Like celebrities: when you get their autograph they always write “best wishes” or something arbitrary followed by an “x” (or an “xo” if you’re really lucky) and a scribble that looks vaguely like it might contain at least one actual letter of their name. Then you get shoved down the line so the super important celebrity can lather, rinse & repeat with the hundreds of people behind you. Are we that important that we can’t wrangle up at least one extra letter? “OK,” perhaps? (Though, to be honest, that’s probably only marginally less annoying than “K.”)

What about the days when you were charged by the text, both incoming and outgoing? I can’t be the only one who got more than a little annoyed when someone cost me 10 cents just to say, “K.” For 10 cents you better have been sending me a full sentence complete with no unnecessary shorthand & proper punctuation.

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I know the point I made above is now considered moot since the majority of us are fortunate enough to be on some sort of plan which allows for unlimited texting, so why is this “K” thing still so annoying? For me there are two reasons:

1.) “K” has too many possible interpretations.

K, what?

As in, “Ok, Cool,” “I’m looking forward to it,” or ‘K’ as in “whatever. I’m done talking to you, you chatty nerd.” Or, “I’m sorry, my hands were bitten off by a t-rex & I can only text with my nose. ‘K’ is the best I can do.” The most terrifying thing to go through my mind might be, “K. Because I’m going to feed you to a shark. Shark has K in it.”

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135ee6abbb34c616b6b3144d97f77e65-jpgWhat do you mean?! There are no tonal clues with the letter K. There are no facial cues, no body language we can assess to determine if this letter is friendly or if this letter has nefarious, diabolical plans which include me ending up with a hole in my neck. Those of us with anxious brains prone to over-thinking need answers to these questions.

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2.) Time. I am busy. Maybe not I get 5000 texts in a day because I’m so important busy, but I do have a husband, 3 kids, a small business, a need to take time out to exercise, errands to run, a dog to walk, bills to pay, homework to help with, & endless amounts of laundry & dishes to do. I’m busy the way most of us are busy so while my time may not be any more or less important than yours, stopping what I’m doing to find my phone (which, at this point, is basically always on a charger which is not in the same room with me) just to read one lonely letter & nearly have a panic attack over the possible meanings of that letter & how to respond (or not), feels like a waste of time, energy, & internet data.

Bonus reason: while I know this is not always the intention, it can be rude.

Of course, we’re all going to do it every now and then, but if you frequently reply with a letter when I’m trying to have a conversation with you, please know that I’ve thought about cutting you.

Me: Hey, love! How are you?

Them: k

Me: K, good? or K, bad?

Them: just k

Me: There is no such thing as “just k.”

Them: k

Me: *screams*

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Can you relate? Does ‘K’ bother you? Why or why not? Do you have any fun reasons to add or creative responses to people who frequently do the ‘K’ thing? I’m planning a post on how to respond to ‘K’ and I’d love to see your best answers!

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Typos: The Funny & The Humiliating

I’ve been thinking about typos a lot lately.

Mostly because I make several during the course of any given day. I tend to correct the most heinous of these before public consumption, but every now and then, one slips through the cracks. We’re only human I suppose. But for my part, I fear the universe is out to get me.

I once ended a professional email with “Retards,”…. Yeah, it was supposed to say “Regards.” Thankfully, the person who received this email knew it was a typo & had a great big laugh about it. I almost had a coronary, but – thankfully (again) – this was avoided upon finding out that I was not, in fact, fired.

On another, less humiliating, occasion I almost (key word: almost!) sent a tweet that said “You Cock!” instead of the intended “You Rock!” That could have ended badly.

What about God’s punishment for continually typing “dog” every time I mean to refer to Our Father (Thou Art in Heaven)? I reached 666 fans on my SpiffySnaps facebook page & a number that was previously moving at a fairly rapid speed just suddenly halted for 40 minutes. 40 minutes of which I watched the computer like a hawk waiting for the deep bellow of the beast & his swarm of red-eyed demons to come exploding from my iMac in a ring of fiery destruction. That totally didn’t happen, but you made your point, God. I’ll be more careful with my spelling. “Dear Dog” isn’t a fabulous way to start a prayer anyway & certainly not a way to insure that said prayer reaches the right ears. Although, I’m sure God could hear a prayer through a dog’s ears because…well, he’s God.

I seem to keep sticking my foot in my mouth so I’ll stop with the God stuff and just pray for forgiveness later. You think God gives out advances on forgiveness? No? Hm.

I can’t be the first person who’s witnessed someone talking about the movie 21 Jump Street & called it “21 Hump Street,” can I? And be assured, it was actually a typo and not an homage’ to Magic Mike. Well, not at first…though, it quickly turned into that.

Do you have any embarrassing typos you’d like to share? Don’t worry – I’m not judging you; while typing this, I totally just spelled typos “typis” which sounds more like a disease than something you do with a keyboard.