🎵 …Because I’m Happy ðŸŽµ

Today is a good day.
 • My best friend gave birth to a gorgeous little girl last night & I woke up to pictures of her happy family, which put a big smile on my face. Knowing that I’ll get to see them soon makes me even happier.
 • I had a parent-teacher conference this morning and I only cried a little bit. *winning!* I also curled my hair. *trying too hard* *also winning*
 • I have orders in my Etsy shop that are all painted & waiting to be shipped.
 • Our bills are paid. Our pantry, fridge & freezer are stocked. I have gas in my car & my radio still works. (Not that it was ever in danger of not working; I’m simply thankful for it.)
 Regardless of all I have to celebrate and be thankful for, some days I feel like I can barely function. I over-analyze my interactions with people, & feel guilt & embarrassment over things which the logical, rational side of me knows are ridiculous. I wonder why I said this or that thing, or why I didn’t say something. I often feel inadequate; I’m not enough or I’m not doing enough. I take responsibility for things that couldn’t possibly be my fault, but I bet you I can twist it in my brain until it is. I am not gracious with myself when I make mistakes, no matter how small.
 I say that to say this:
I’m still happy. I am SO happy because I have so much to be happy about! But often, it takes an intentional effort on my part. I don’t just wake up burping sunshine & farting rainbows. I have to count my blessings and remind myself daily of all I have to be grateful for. I have to intentionally think positive thoughts & say positive things. I have to surround myself with positive people, which is a bit more challenging than you might think. I have to practice yoga daily. I have to pray & ask for help. I have to watch what I eat & stay the heck away from caffeine! (Which, unfortunately since I paint coffee mugs I have a hard time doing – I have to test them, right? *wink wink*) I have to interact with people, go for walks & get outside even when I don’t want to…especially when I don’t want to.
 Sometimes I do a pretty great job, like today. Sometimes I fail and I let my irrational feelings swallow me. Sometimes I just fake it, for my benefit as much as anyone else’s.
 So, if you’re reading this, maybe you could remember it; consider it the next time you interact with “a happy person.” That person you’ve rarely seen without a smile on their face, the one you might go to for a laugh, for comfort, for sound advice…
Remember that sometimes they need someone, too. They may be sad, anxious or struggling in some way and they won’t always say it for of fear of embarrassment, shame, or just not wanting to burden anyone else. Sometimes they cover their struggle with a blanket of humor. Sometimes they don’t know what to say or how to say it. Sometimes there’s nothing they can attribute their sadness to & they just don’t want to hear “what do you have to be upset about? There are people everywhere who have it so much worse.” I promise you they know that already. You might think those people already know they are loved, needed and necessary in the world, but they don’t always. Sometimes they need to be reminded.
Today I challenge you –  first – to remind someone how necessary they are because you never know when they might need to hear it, & secondly, not to take anyone’s smile for granted; they may have done a lot of work to put it there.
 ….And…that’s all the word vomit I’ve got for you today folks!
 Now, I am going to go lend myself to something productive. Happy Tuesday everyone! Thanks for reading. Comment &/or share if you feel so inclined. 🙂

Some Thoughts on Punctuality, Trash, Free Potatoes, & Twin Grandmothers

Today is a good day.

I (accidentally, but thankfully) slept in, the kids didn’t get to school TOO terribly late (they even had time for showers & pretzel sticks for breakfast!), & I cleaned up some trash on our road & in our yard (that was put there by coyotes, I just know it!) because I don’t do the trash-on-the-ground thing.

This is Ian Somerhalder being proud that I pick up trash.
This is Ian Somerhalder being proud that I pick up trash.

tumblr_n0q4aosoWV1rr54cto1_500I mailed some stuff. Visited my dad, & then I had lunch with my sister. I wasn’t going to go because I didn’t have the money to be perfectly honest, but I did because it’s my sister &…buttered potatoes…YUSS. 58Then, wouldn’t ya know…she paid for it because she’s awesome & also because I’m pretty sure the universe was looking out for me. Good karma got me some free buttered potatoes, y’all! I think I’ll pick up trash & agree to lunch even when I’m broke EVERYDAY. Maybe Karma will bring me Ian Somerhalder instead of trans fats next time? A girl can hope. (No, I don’t care that he’s married…his human can come, too, because I want to hug her.)

After lunch, I looked at some flowers, but I didn’t buy them because my bank account told me I couldn’t. I’m glad I stopped though because while I was flower-gazing, I saw my grandmother’s twin! My heart skipped a beat & I had to do a double take. I totally wanted to hug her, but I refrained because being committed to the crazy house would have ruined my good mood. I snuck a picture, but because I don’t want to completely disregard this poor woman’s privacy, I won’t post it here. If you’d like to see my ‘grandmother from another mother who isn’t mine’ just come over…I’ll break out the iPhone and show you. If you don’t know where I live, you don’t know me well enough to be asking questions about my grandmother; the real ethereal one or the physical fake one.

I also received a fortune from the Chinese place that said, “Borrow money from pessimists. They don’t expect it back.” That made me laugh. I then determined that pessimists are just people who are super kind, but are bitter about it. That made me laugh, too. It also made me think of my husband & father-in-law. They both have a large capacity for kindness, but they lace it with expletives. It’s a thing. You learn to love it.

Legendary-how-i-met-your-mother-33203140-500-500It’s not even 2 pm in Georgia yet & I already I’ve had such a lovely day. It would have been easy for me to wake up with an attitude and write the whole day off, because when you oversleep and get your kids to school late, that doesn’t exactly scream “LEGENDARY DAY!” But it’s much more enjoyable to just find the little blessings in everything.

Just goes to show…it truly is all about your perspective.

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The Golden Rule & Other Stuff

Hey y’all!

Earlier in the week I wrote about how comparison is the thief of joy. While I was writing, it inspired many other posts, but for today I just want to focus on one. One that I think it’s important for parents to consider: what does our treatment of ourselves teach our children?

I was talking about how I watched my mom struggle with her weight when it struck me that seeing and hearing her speak about herself in such an unfavorable way, as well as witnessing her just accept all the other BS that people somehow think it’s their right to chime in on, probably had a lot to do with how I viewed myself as an adolescent. Not that it was my mom’s fault or anything, but witnessing that sort of negative self-image at some point became the norm in my mind. That was how it was supposed to be. It made it okay, and even expected in some circles (like at school for example), that I shouldn’t see myself in a more positive light. Kinda like this:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VhCzRr9EwBk

I was under the complete misconception that a person with any sort of confidence was conceited & narcissistic because I learned, however inadvertently, that it was more accepted to put oneself down than to do the opposite. I think the thing that saved me from believing that lie all the way into adulthood is seeing how my mother treated other people for the most part. She was mostly kind, generous, caring, sweet, funny; these are the words that other people use when they describe her and they’re right. I got my example of how to respect others from my mom & that  lesson eventually integrated itself into a lesson on how we should treat ourselves as well.

I’ve heard my mom complain about how unattractive she felt and wish aloud that she were still little like she used to be. I watched people insult her, point out her flaws, hurt her feelings, and then claim they were being helpful. I’ve watched her go on diet after diet and work tirelessly to lose weight. I’ve watched her struggle with shopping and clothing choices. I’ve seen her sad, dejected and more than a little heartbroken. Throughout all that time when she was struggling to get thinner to meet some impossible standard, I thought she was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. I think all kids think their mom is the prettiest, but I knew mine was. It never mattered what size jeans she wore or how big her hair was (can we say Susan Lucci in the 80s!)…I always thought she looked gorgeous.

My mom has since lost a lot of weight – an accomplishment she should be very proud of, not because of the weight loss itself, but because of what that change has added to her life. She seems so much happier as a result. I’ve seen her flourish in spite of, or perhaps because of, difficult circumstances. I’ve observed her making many positive changes. No matter what she did though, people still came out from everywhere waving their opinions around as if she should care. “You’ve lost too much weight. You’re too little.” And before she was “too big.” There was always a lot of pressure placed on her to be what everyone else expected her to be. People would complain that she’s too sweet or too soft spoken (“too” everything) but let her get mad enough one time and it goes from “you’re too sweet” to “you’re batsh!t crazy” in .012549999 seconds. I said both of these things earlier, but it bears repeating…you can’t make everyone happy AND people should take their mama’s advice more often: if you don’t have anything nice to say, keep your friggin’ mouth shut. Or in the words of my granddaddy, “don’t mess with stuff that doesn’t concern you.” I think that applies to speaking about things that don’t concern you as well.

I am so sick of hearing people talk about other people’s weight/personality/social status/(fill in the blank here). If you don’t like the way you look or anything else about your life that’s fine – change what you feel needs to be changed, but do it for yourself & not for everyone else, otherwise you’ll never really be content. There are two things I hope my readers take away from this post:

A.) while you’re making your changes, your kids are watching you and they are listening to you. Be mindful of that when you talk about yourself out loud. Your children are learning how to love from you and that includes learning how to love themselves. Be respectful, be positive as often as possible, be kind and actively practice loving yourself at all your different stages & pants sizes. Lead by example; be what you want your kids to be one day, speak how you want them speak, love how you want them to love, teach them to do hard things, teach them what to expect from others as far as love & respect are concerned & teach them to never accept less than that.

B.) If you don’t like something about someone or the way they choose to live their lives, that’s fine, but there is no need to be a complete jackass and voice that opinion out loud if it won’t serve any purpose greater than unleashing negative & poisonous thoughts into the world. It is not our place to judge. Worry about yourself and leave other people alone unless what they’re doing is genuinely dangerous to their life or the lives of their family. Your kids are watching how you treat people and one day they will treat others exactly the way you taught them to, rather than the way you told them to.

That is all. I shall abdicate my soap box now. 🙂

 

You Get +10 Points For Reading This Post

I think I have found the holy grail of…we’ll call it “behavior management & character development”…for my minions. What I mean by that is that we’ve found a genius way to punish them for bad stuff & reward them for good stuff. It may not work for everyone, but since we’ve been doing it, it’s been working great for us. It’s the first time the kids have actually been excited about a plan their dad and I have come up with & wanted to follow through on it just as much as we wanted them to. I didn’t want to get excited too soon for fear of jinxing it, but I can’t resist sharing any longer.

It’s a points system. You know…like frequent flier miles except way better & tailored to your kids behavior, academics or whatever you want to tailor it to. Minion #2, Princess Sassypants, got grounded the first of this month & after trying (largely unsuccessfully) just about every other conceivable punishment on earth, we decided to try yet another method. Instead of telling her how long she was grounded for and attempting to confine her to a bedroom, take away toys, etc. we decided to make a few changes to our usual tactics.

Enter the points system.

Here are a couple screen shots of my computer:

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We told Princess Sassypants that this system means she has complete control over how long she’s grounded for. So far, I think we made the right choice with this because I feel like a lot of her problem is feeling too restricted, like she has little to no control over her own life so she resists absolutely everything. It’s been 10 days & I suspect that sometime tomorrow, Princess Sassypants will be ungrounded. For her, this is serious because this child literally cares about NOTHING. I have taken her toys away. Didn’t care. Taken her iPad/electronics/TV time away. Didn’t care. Made her follow me around & clean all day long. Didn’t care. Write & do extra credit work for school. Not a single care. Made her do exercises. Nope. Spanked her. Didn’t make an impact either. There are a ton of other things I could list that we have tried, but the point is that only two of them have made an impact and both of those things were reward systems. That is the way to get through to my girl apparently.

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Minion #1, Mr. Thoughtful, got grounded on the 7th for a lie he told at school. Don’t let the name Mr. Thoughtful fool you; he’s a good kid, but he does some stupid stuff, too…like fifth grade forgery. I’m sure he’s going to make his 500 points tomorrow as well. The difference is that it took him 3-4 days versus Princess Sassypants’ 10-11 days, but he’s always been way easier to motivate than she is.

Screen Shot 2014-10-10 at 8.01.26 PM Because of how enthusiastic they were   about getting off restriction, the hubs and I decided that a points system for everything might be something to try. So, while the two oldest were trying to earn points to get off restriction, we let the youngest earn “Reward Points” using the same list of jobs. While they’re grounded, they can’t earn Reward Points, but once they’re eligible for Reward Points we plan on letting them accumulate and letting the kids cash them in for different rewards like movie nights or special things they want. We haven’t quite worked out what things will be on the reward list or how many points they’re going to be worth yet, but I’ll be working on that soon. My son seems to think he’s going to earn an iPad by using this method of earning reward points, but what he doesn’t know yet is that in order to earn an iPad he’s going to have to save up something ridiculous like 10,000 points…which means my house is about to be super clean. YES!

This is working so well thus far that even two of my nephews and a niece are trying to earn points right along with my kids. I am SO loving this! 🙂

I’m really hopeful that we’ve finally found a way to settle a lot of problems we were having. Chores and schoolwork were a battle to get done and now they’re fighting over who gets to do what chore, reading a whole lot more, doing homework without being asked and even helping each other with their work. Keep your fingers crossed for us that this continues to be successful long term. I’m too exhausted to think of another “behavior management & character development” plan right now. Lol

Now it’s your turn –

What are/were some of your biggest parenting challenges? What have you done with your kids that has been successful? I want to swap horror and/or success stories. 😀 

Photographer Of The Week Say What?!

Hey y’all,
Guess what?! I’m photographer of the week over at BP4U Guides! I’ll add some icons to my sidebar shortly, but I was too excited about the news to wait. You can check out the post here:

http://www.bp4ublog.com/editors-choice/georgia-photographer-of-the-week-spiffysnaps-photography/

And let me know if you’re a local photographer who would like trade sessions or something because this girl needs a decent head shot lol.

If you’re curious to know what BP4U Guides is, it’s a website full of tools and tips for photographers. I use their products a lot when I want to save time. It’s an awesome website run by some of the sweetest people. Thanks for featuring me this week! Y’all are amazing! 🙂

Hey y’all!
Check out my website where I reveal my new hairstyle + talk about the joys of being a weird mom and an atypical business owner. You can find the post here: http://spiffysnaps.zenfolio.com/blog/2014/5/pink-hair-potato-storage
Don’t forget to share the post &/or leave a comment! I want to know about your struggles with balance, too so we can maybe help others like ourselves. At the very least, it would be cool to know there are other parents and business owners who have really awesome, funky hair 😉 Don’t forget pictures!! (& to share the post because that’s really important (: )

Thinkin’ ‘Bout Thursday

I love Thursday’s.

Thursday, for me, is equivalent to the rest of the normal population’s Friday.

Not because it’s the end of my work week, because it isn’t. I still like Friday for that very reason, but Friday has a really sucky role in the week department if you ask me. The only reason anyone likes Friday is because they have to go through Friday to get to Saturday.

It’s like being in middle school. You know…you finally make friends with “the cool guy,” the popular kid, yada, yada so on and so forth. You have this super-sized crush on him and he seems like he’s really into you, too, when he asks to come over to your house to “study.”

And then it turns out that he’s gay and the only thing he wants to study is your older brother.

*Do you hear the cheesy, comedy-night cymbals clanging in the background, too?*
OMG, it’s Justin Beiber!

Makes total sense, right?

No? Okay, let me s’plain it to ya. In that scenario, you’re Friday; your hot, older brother is Saturday; and Justin Beiber is just trying to work his gay little way up the ladder and through the rest of the week.

Honestly, I just wanted to make fun of Beiber (who is just pinch-his-cheeks adorable) and use the phrase “gay little way” in a sentence. Don’t judge me.

So, why Thursday out of all the days of the week? Lot’s of reasons.

Monday-Wednesday I am – pardon the expression – “balls-to-the-wall” busy at work. Especially Wednesday’s! There are Wednesday’s that I don’t think I’m going to make it through without a mental breakdown and a gang of white coats coming to take me away.


Thursday is the first day of my week not entirely suffused with the stress of life, deadlines, hustling to make sure the minions make it on time to their various extra curricular activities, and just hustling in general. In other words, it’s my lazy day. Thursday is what gets me through those particularly awful Wednesday’s, like yesterday. I think, “self…think of tomorrow. You will have an absolutely glorious amount of NOTHING to do on Thursday. Let’s get Wednesday over with!”

So, Thursday is my motivation to go all mob boss on Wednesday’s arse and just kill it.

It is also…

*dum dum dum*

Vampire Diaries Day! Or at least it will be in a week. Anything involving Ian Somerhalder and Paul Wesley makes me feel pretty darn good.

Don’t tell me those baby blues wouldn’t put you in a better mood, too.

No, I’m not a teenager, but I’m glad I’m not because my mother would never allow me to watch Vampire Diaries if I were, muchless watch it with me. And we have a date next Thursday to do just that, which means even if next Wednesday is the most sucktacular Wednesday in the existence of ever, Thursday will do one better than simply get me through it – it will make me excited about it!

So I know I said there were lots of reasons that I love Thursday and I only gave you two, but those are my favorite reasons and I also have 3 little minions I have to go get ready for a Minion Football Game tonight! That is yet another reason Thursday’s are great – I get to go watch my babies show off all the hard work they put in at practices the rest of the week.

Mr. Thoughtful is playing, Princess Sassypants is cheering and The Cuteness tries to do both at the same time right along with her brother and sister, only in the crowd & in that tiny, precious 5-year old voice that I love so much so it makes it incredibly fun to watch!

So, my stopping here isn’t just lazy blogging. I actually have motherly duties to perform. Like yelling at my son to make that big kid on the other team go crying to his mama!

So now, I’m outta here.

Happy Thursday!

Kings, Queens & Mermaids

My family & I recently visited West Point Lake in LaGrange, GA. I got some great shots! I was initially trying to share this on my SpiffySnaps photo blog, but apparently Bethylicious is jealous of SpiffySnaps & was begging to be blogged on again because somehow, even though I’m sure I clicked SpiffySnaps, here I am. I’ll just reblog this there.
I have to share my favorite first. I love the calm feel of this one & as soon as we close on our new house, I’m definitely ordering a canvas of it to hang in our sun room!
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This is my son. As someone on my facebook page aptly pointed out, he’s probably thinking “Can I pee here?”
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Minion #2 who is literally shouting “I’m the queen of the world!” She’s so hard to get photos of sometimes so unfortunately, while this isn’t the only one I have of her, it’s the only one (that I’ve come across from the day so far) that I thought was really good. When I finish going through the photos, maybe I’ll have more to share.
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But her brother, Minion #1, did it first…
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The Cuteness (formerly known as Minion #3) is determined to learn how to swim:
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Look! He’s a shark!
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This is the look The Cuteness wore for all of 3 seconds after she discovered that her cousin was not only pretending to be a shark, but his objective was to grab her leg & scare the bejeesus out of her:
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And now I think she must be splashing him…
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Minion #1 with what he called a “Starfish leaf.”
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Some water shots:
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And The Cuteness pointing at…something. This is how I would look if I ever saw Ian Somerhalder. Perhaps she saw a mermaid in the water… 🙂
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I Am Not A Damn Duck

“You can only do you; you can only do today.”

That is something that I need to remember. (Thanks Fibromy-Awesome.)

I have a tendency sometimes to want to do everything to make someone else happy (or several someone else‘s) regardless of how it affects my life and happiness. I feel guilty every single time I do even the tiniest thing for myself if it means that someone else has to sacrifice so much as a modicum of their own comfort (or anything else). That can be a good thing; putting other people first. But in my case, it’s more debilitating and stressful than anything else.

I try to keep a handle on it but sometimes I still slip. It wouldn’t be a problem if it weren’t for the fact that I get so caught up in pleasing every other person in my immediate universe that I drive myself completely insane & neglect my own needs & those of my family. And not only that, but you can only do so much and there comes a point where no matter how badly you want to do everything, you just can’t. Little by little, things start slipping through the cracks even though you don’t mean for them to and that is when mistakes are made, feelings get hurt and emotions become raw and overwhelming. So all that pleasing you were trying to do just backfires, blows up in your face and makes you the exact opposite of everything you were trying to be. What good is that?

I don’t want to disappoint anyone. Ever. I literally feel sick with guilt when I do. But that’s life and it’s completely impossible to make every single person who crosses your path 100% satisfied at all times. Knowing that should make it easier not to try to please everyone. It should make it easier to say no and/or let it glide like water off a duck’s back when someone expresses a negative emotion directly related to something you did or said. It should make it easier not to care so much what people think. Right?

WRONG.

Knowing something doesn’t make it easier to deal with. Especially if that something you’re trying to deal with has been a part of your personality and character since you can remember. It’s just who I am. Just because I don’t react to things the way someone else would or might want me to doesn’t mean that I’m wrong or unreasonable. Feelings aren’t right or wrong. They just are. (A little shout to mkultra76 – you have to read The Pants Puzzlement…funny stuff.)

I’m done apologizing for mine. I’m done apologizing for who I am just because someone else may not like it or the decisions that I make.

I care what people think (about certain things) even when I don’t want to. I’m sensitive. I’m insecure to an insane degree. I’m emotional. But I’m strong and even if no one else knows it, I do. I’ve been through too much in my life – gotten through too much in my life so far – to let anyone make me feel like I’m not strong enough to handle any situation that comes my way. I’m also smart & witty. I’m good at photography and at the risk of being downright egotistical, I think I’m a great writer. Not the best, by far, but I’ll be damned if I don’t NOT completely suck at it. Or wait….crap. You know what I mean.

Chances are I’ll cry in certain situations because that’s just a natural reaction passed down to me from my mother. Can’t help it when it’s in the genes. When I’m sad, I cry. When I’m mad, I cry. When something really moves me in a good way, I cry. Who cares? That doesn’t mean I’m weak. You might knock me down for a while, but I always get back up. I always keep on going and I’ll try to face the next day with more grace and knowledge than the last.

So from now on, I have a mission. It’ll be a permanent thing that I’ll have to work at every single day. I’ll slip and I’ll have to find a way to use that slip as a another stone with which to build a bridge that I can walk across to a place where I can put myself first without feeling needlessly guilty about it. Though I still care very much what other people think & I will still have this crazy, habitual feeling that I need to make everyone happy, I’m going to try not to cater to it. I’m done caring if something upsets someone else; it’s not my problem anymore. As a matter of fact, it probably never was to begin with. I won’t apologize for being myself anymore. I’m done undervaluing myself and continuously second-guessing my thoughts & feelings. I’m going to quit giving a damn about everyone else for a while and spend some time getting to know ME. I’d love to see what I’m like when I don’t have this tainted feeling that my own value and self-worth are directly related to how many people I can make happy in a given day. Maybe it sounds selfish to you? But I think making ourselves a priority sometimes is a very, very good thing. Not to the point that you become narcissistic, of course, but your own health, sanity and capabilities should be taken into account when you’re making decisions that affect not only you, but other people. If you become overwhelmed, how can you perform your best for someone else? If you’re constantly worried about what everyone else is thinking and feeling, you’re just sabotaging your own success. You need to feel cared for, important and in control to do your best work. That means saying no sometimes. It means accepting that you can’t be everything for everyone and realizing that it’s okay.

You can only do what you can do. You can only do you. You can only do today.

♫And It’s A GREAT Day To Be Alive… â™ª

It’s been a while, yes? More than a week anyway so that may not constitute “a while” for the rest of you, but it is for me. I didn’t even make a July 4th post which is odd for me considering I’m an Army wife and way proud of our soliders.

So Happy *belated* 4th! I hope everyone enjoyed your long weekends to celebrate our freedom!!

Our weekend wasn’t filled with music, warm weather, face painting, American flags and celebratory fireworks like I hope everyone else’s was, but it was a celebration in its own kind of way. See, we’re supposed to be at home in Georgia right now, but instead, we’re still in Germany. Where does the celebration come in, then? Mostly, it stems from the fact that we’re even alive.

The day we left for the airport was June 28th (& my G-ma’s b-day R.I.P!). We picked up a friend who was going to drive our truck back from the airport for us so we wouldn’t have to pay for long-term parking and then we went on our way. I was sitting in the middle and hadn’t had much sleep the night before so I laid my head down on my knees and fell asleep. About two hours into our trip while driving on the autobahn, I was jolted awake (briefly) by the feel of the truck swerving heavily, but I don’t remember the vast majority of what I’m about to tell you after that part because I was knocked unconscious shortly thereafter. The story was put together for me by our friend, my husband and a tiny bit by the kids. It turns out a little orange Audi TT cut in front of us in the fast lane causing my husband, who was driving, to have to slam the brakes in order to avoid hitting him. He was about a foot or less away from slamming into the cars rear when he swerved to miss it. We were doing about 90mph so when he swerved, he lost control of the truck, we slid across 3 lanes of traffic – miraculously not hitting anyone – until we landed in the dirt and started flipping. The truck rolled over anywhere from 3-5 times, but I only felt the first one because that was the point at which I hit my head on either the dashboard or the steering wheel and passed out. Apparently, I was thrown over my husband and could have potentially gone out the drivers side window, but he grabbed me, turned his back to the open window and held on for dear life. We even made a nice little path through the trees before we finally stopped in one place with the truck landing on all four tires. And the Audi that started the whole thing? That asshole kept driving.

I can’t really see it that clearly, but this was a picture of where we slid through the trees, taken by the friend that was with us almost immediately after the accident. Supposedly you can see the shape of the truck back up in there somewhere, but to be perfectly honest, I don’t see it.

I find this whole experience to be ridiculously full of miracles. I’m listing them in chronological order – not order of importance because the most important thing is, of course, that we’re all alive.

First of all, going across 3 lanes of traffic on the autobahn, where there really is no enforced speed limit unless it’s raining (and it wasn’t) and not hitting any other oncoming traffic? I believe that counts as miracle number one.

2.)  No one else was hurt or caused to wreck.

3.) The back seat of the truck, where our children were buckled in, was untouched. The windows and doors…everything…was still in tact and aside from being shaken up & scared, the kids were fine. No broken bones, no serious injuries. Little James had a cut on his finger, Krysta has a scratch on her forehead & Kira has a few tiny cuts on her fingers and a black eye. That was it for them and to say I’m thankful is the understatement of the century. They were my very first thought when I felt us swerve and start to roll that first time and apparently they were my last thought for about 10 minutes or so because I got knocked out after that.

4.) The other passenger we had with us in the front was free of any serious injuries as well. He got a pretty nasty-lookin’ bruise from the seatbelt and whiplash, but other than that, just the normal bumps and bruises. He helped get our children out of the backseat and made sure they were okay. I’m incredibly thankful that he wasn’t hurt because my husband and I would have harbored a crazy amount of guilt if he had been, not to mention the unbearable pain it would have caused for his family. I’m grateful that he was such a help to us with our children as well and I’m also 100% positive that he will never get in a vehicle with us again…

See, my sense of humor lives on 🙂

5.) The whole drivers’ side of the truck was caved in where my husband and I were and yet we’re still here.

6.) The air bags did not deploy and (yes, I’m going to say it again) we’re still here. Also, my husband is dead set on a law-suit because of this. He said, “Dodge is gonna buy us a new house & two new vehicles! From Chevy!” <—Isn’t that like the ultimate middle finger to a car company? It’s like walking into a McDonald’s with a Burger King bag or meeting Britney Spears just so you can get her to sign your Christina Aguilera CD (which I totally want to do, by the way).

I know without a doubt in my mind that someone or something was watching over us that day because we wouldn’t be here otherwise.

My husband has 2 broken ribs and bruised lungs. I have 3 broken vertebrae’s, my lungs are bruised like the hubby’s, but I also have some blood built up in them and we both have to be very careful in following Dr.s orders so we don’t develop pneumonia. I have a pinched nerve somewhere that is causing my right arm to drive me insane, but hopefully that will loosen up soon. I’m tired of having my last 3 fingers feel like they’re asleep when my thumb and index finger feel fine – it’s so weird!! I hit my head repeatedly so my face is pretty beaten up and swollen, but all the injuries, bumps and bruises that we have are expected to heal completely. Can I just say THANK YOU, GOD over and over again? And a GIANT thank you to my husband, too, because if he hadn’t grabbed me and held on, my injuries would be so much worse right now. I ♥ you!

I don’t remember having the following picture taken because I was in shock at the time and I had so much head trauma that I literally couldn’t remember anything the first 10-15 minutes after I came back from the land of the unconscious. I couldn’t have even told you my own name at the time and I kept asking the same questions repeatedly. I bet that was annoying…

I did remember the kids though and I’m sure they got annoyed with me, too, because I kept asking them over and over again if they were okay.

Shortly after that, I did get it together though and started remembering everything. They took my husband and I to two separate hospitals and (after cutting my first ever Victoria Secret bra!! *sad face*) put us both in ICU. I didn’t get to talk to him until the next day. Meanwhile, our friend stayed with the kids in the hospital until they prepared a place for them in the children’s clinic. He came up when he was able to see me and took this picture because I was morbidly curious to see what I looked like at the time.

The kids were in the hospital for 3 days, but since they were fine, they were released before I was so some amazing & wonderful friends of ours graciously kept them while we were still in the hospital. James actually got released the same time the kiddos did, but he refused to leave me at the hospital and stayed with me while I was there another 2 days. I’m sure he was supremely uncomfortable, but he never left me and was so unbearably sweet the whole time. The German girl I was sharing the room with told me at one point “your husband is so beautiful to you.” And he really, really is. I won’t get into all the details because I don’t want to embarass him, but I will say that I am incredibly blessed to have married him and he has turned into such an amazing man, husband & father – even if he is a little rough around the edges ♥

When I was finally able to check facebook again (from my husband’s phone) I was so completely overwhelmed with all the prayers, well-wishes, we-love-and-miss-you’s & get-better-soon’s that I still don’t even have words to express how much it meant to me. It’s an amazing feeling to have so many people thinking about you and wishing you well – it’s fantastic to be loved! 🙂 And I genuinely do appreciate every single one of you! When we got back home, we had friends offer to cook for us, help us get our recycling taken off, offers to take us to doctor’s appointments or wherever else we need go in the next few days, help with chores and the kids…seriously – thank you all so, so much. I feel like I would be taking advantage to accept everyone’s offers to help, but just knowing that so many people care enough to even make the suggestion makes me want to cry.

I will admit that there was one thing that annoyed me and it has nothing to do with those whose offers of help and friendship were genuine. Over the course of 3 days, I got 10 friend requests on facebook from people who have never shown any interest in talking with me or being my friend EVER, but right after the accident, my facebook was flooded with requests from people who pretty much just wanted to be a part of the gossip. It’s safe to assume I denied ALL of those and it irks me so much that some people are so nosy & ill-mannered that they feel the need to try and make their lives more interesting by gossiping about events from someone else’s life. Also there were rumors flying around at first that we were in a plane crash, our injuries were depicted inaccurately and some people were even saying that the only reason my husband and I were flying home is to get a divorce! So, I guess there were 2 big annoyances if you want to count the rumor mill, but that will always be in effect everywhere you go. Maybe I should have added the gossipers so they could at least keep their damn story straight?!

Ok- tiny bi-polar rant over 🙂 I’ll go back to being thankful and happy now.

Here is a picture of me the day after the accident when I got moved out of the ICU and was finally able to shower. BTW – you would not believe the amount of dirt and glass particles I found in my ears and everywhere else – scary!

I thought I should smile because I looked really scary otherwise…

I took another photo the day we came home because there was a lot of talk on facebook about seeing what I looked like and people who had pictures were not posting them out of respect (thank you!!) so I figured “what the hell?” and posted my own pictures. I didn’t smile in this one because I wanted to be able to see the blood in the corners of my eyes (because that is so bad ass! :P), but I’m thinking I really should have because I totally look like a zombie.

On the other hand, the hot pink color on my eye-lids was kinda pretty (before it started turning all yucky like the above picture) so I may be investing in some eyeshadow soon.

And this is me today:

Heehee…who says I shouldn’t be having a little fun right now? I know what my makeup will look like on Halloween 2011!!

Also, I did some with effects because my husband is gone cleaning all the stuff out of the truck (and trying to find his and Krysta’s glasses that are hopefully still in there and not broken) and I’m really very bored right now.

Alright, enough of that. I’m not taking pictures of all the other bruises I have because I can’t see most of them except in the mirror right now and also because that would just be creeptacular…although, if I could reach the one behind my ear to take a picture of it, I totally would because it’s such an odd place to have a bruise that I’m fascinated with it.

Here are some photos that hubby brought back with him of the truck:

 

Can you believe the air bags didn’t deploy after all that?

There are a ton more, but this is all I feel like sharing. Should I reiterate the whole “Thank God” thing again?? No? You got it? Okay…good 🙂

I’m so tired of talking about this so I hope this helps clear up the curiosity for the rest of you 🙂 I am going to take a Tylenol 3 and attempt to pass out somewhere.

xoxo