The Bad Blogger

Dear 2017,

As part of a 30 day blog challenge to get me writing again, I’ve decided to talk to you a little bit about the name of my blog & what my goals are this year. I know you and your cousin, 2018, couldn’t possibly care less about my goals or my blog, but I do and since I let 2016 beat me into silence I’m determined not to let the same thing happen with you. So here goes…

I just realized my blog has no name. I have a web address (1badblogger.wordpress.com), but no actual blog name. No tag line explaining what my blog is about. How have I had a blog for years now and managed to not give it a proper name or context?! I guess that happens when you’re a bad blogger. Maybe that should be my name. The Bad Blogger. Erin Motz gets to be the Bad Yogi so I can claim the title of Bag Blogger…assuming no one has claimed it already. *does quick google search* Okay so it’s sort of taken. What I mean by “sort of” is that when “the bad blogger” is typed into google, you get a flickr account of barely dressed Asian chicks, but no actual blog by that name. Regardless, I still like it. Every article I read about blogging tells you to write about what you know, pick a theme and keep your posts generally within that genre. Tutorials, DIY, parenting, humor, photography, advice, art. music, books…etc. but what if I don’t want to stick to one theme? What if I don’t want to be put in a box? What if I want to hop around like an ADHD 6 year old on red dye #5 & coca-cola?

These articles also tell you to write once a week or  more. I’ve tried, but consistency just isn’t my thing. The only thing I’ve ever been consistent with is my husband, my kids, & being inconsistent. I’ve never finished a single challenge I’ve started and I probably won’t finish this one. I want to write when the mood strikes me, when inspiration hits, when I damn well want to, thank you very much. Whether that’s once a week (which I hope it is) or once every decade.

I’ve read countless advice articles on how to gain followers, increase readership and comment interaction, but what if that’s not what is most important to me? I mean – not gonna lie – having more than three active readers who comment would be a dream come true – but that isn’t my main goal. I didn’t start a blog to become internet famous. I started a blog because I like to write, my kids are funny as they can be & my family was missing things due to our Army-life PCSing, & because Facebook used to have limitations on how long one’s status could be; 2014 may have called to warn you, but just in case she didn’t, I’m a little wordy so it was easier to share my long-winded tales of my two year old singing “what the f***” to a My Little Pony toy on my blog than it was to share it to The Book of Faces.

Basically, I break all the rules. I write about whatever I want whenever I want & I write for an audience of one (plus my mom because some things I want to say she’d wash my mouth out for…sorry Mom, just keepin’ it real.) So what do you think? Should I stick with the lame-o “Bethylicious” title which I hastily gave my blog when I couldn’t think of anything else however many years ago, or should 2017 be the year of The Bad Blogger? You tell me.

Sincerely,

A Really Bad Blogger Currently In The Midst Of A Weird Sort Of Internet Identity Crisis Which I Didn’t Realize I Had Until I Began This Blog Challenge

 

 

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If Rabbits Wore Stiletto’s

It has come to my attention that I am a very peculiar person. Several years ago, before I moved to Germany, I wrote a friend of mine a letter. A letter that I never sent because I am notoriously bad at delivering snail mail to the actual mailbox. After getting “effing bored” with the black pen that I used on two whole pages, I switched to blue and the weirdness began. 

Image“Hey guess what?! Tinkerbell is a babe. They shouldn’t make Disney characters so…so…well just look at her! Like that. And think about Betty Boop! She’s a cartoon – a freakin’ cartoon – sex symbol! But the worst one…Jessica Rabbit. NO ONE LOOKS LIKE THAT! I guess it’s a good thing though because if women really looked like her, the whole male population would combust as soon as they hit puberty and all the other women would have such low self-esteem that they’d either shut themselves up in their homes and expire all alone or they’d just shoot themselves. Then the whole world would end and there would be nothing left except crazy looking human-rabbit hybrids with long legs, red hair and whiskers. I wonder if they’d wear stilettos. it’s hard enough to walk on those with just two feet; Imagine doing it with four.”

Image

After that I made a plea for another friend’s address because I could never contact her to get it from her. So I asked the friend I wrote – we’ll call her ‘Friend A’ – to go steal Friend B’s entire mailbox so that I could write her a letter, put it inside the box and mail the whole thing back. I also said that Friend A should dye her hair blonde so that we – Friend A, Friend B and myself – could call ourselves “The Blontourage.”

WHY in the actual hell would I write something like that?! I’m not sure, but you know what? I love myself for it. 😉 

P.S. – Taryn,

Do you notice the cute firefly in the 2nd picture? Refer to our previous conversation this morning and then tell me I wasn’t meant to find this letter. Lol